Wednesday, May 23, 2007
Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamppost how it feels about dogs.
-Christopher Hampton
Is it just me, or are ninety percent of “sports journalists” schizophrenic?
On Monday night, the Cleveland Cavaliers played the Detroit Pistons in Game One of the Eastern Conference Finals and ultimately fell by a score of 79-76. The closing seconds of that game have been scrutinized to no end ever since Lebron James opted to pass the rock to Donyell Marshall, who was wide open behind the arc. James, meanwhile, was being triple teamed and had no clear path to drive the lane. In this short blurb I do not aim to continue the scrutiny of James’ decision, but to scrutinize the scrutinizers.
These “sports journalists” or “commentators,” whichever you wish to call them, have been reprimanding James ever since Marshall’s shot clanked off of the rim. One of the comments that stuck with me after the game came from a man, a player who I greatly respect; the outspoken Charles Barkley. Barkley said something to the effect of, “Lebron is the best player on his team so he has to get himself a shot and win these games. That’s not a criticism, that’s a fact.”
One of the foremost rules of journalism or any kind of editorial, whether in print or otherwise, is to never present one’s opinions as facts. Shame on you, Charles. Let us talk about facts, shall we?
FACT: James was having a less-than-stellar night shooting, going only 5 for 15.
FACT: Tayshaun Prince had a great angle on James.
FACT: Rasheed Wallace came over to help with the triple team, leaving Donyell Marshall wide open
behind the arc.
FACT: Marshall had made six three-point shots in the previous game.
Make of that what you will, but it seems to me that James decision was a reasonable one if not the correct one, yet somehow you don’t hear much of that if you pick up your local paper or turn on ESPN. Why? Criticism sells better than praise, regardless of how earnest it may or may not be. “Sports propagandists” may be more fitting than “sports journalists.”
Ask yourself this: Would these same individuals be condemning Lebron if Marshall’s shot would have crushed the bottom of the net? The Pistons head coach, Flip Saunders, said it best. “If Donyell makes that shot, then everyone's saying today that Lebron made the right basketball play. I don't think you can judge the play that a guy makes by whether the shot goes in or out. You have to judge by whether you got the right shot, and he got the right shot. It just didn't go in.”
It’s a shame Saunders can’t be alongside Barkley on Inside The NBA.
The Obscure Movie Recommendation for this week may not be “obscure” in the sense that the previous two were. The previous two, “Thirteen Conversations About One Thing” and “Drugstore Cowboy” were, from my experiences, relatively unheard of. The movie I present this week has a known existence as it is relatively new, yet it seems as though few people have actually seen it. After hitting theaters in limited release and making the trek to DVD with no fanfare, “I Heart Huckabees” is my Obscure Movie Recommendation for this week.
One of my favorite movies, “I Heart Huckabees” provides laughs all the way through its 106 minutes. The sharp, quick, and witty dialogue is among the best of any movie I have seen. The story is off-beat as possible as it follows Albert Markovski and his search for the meaning of his own existence. To aid him in his quest, Albert hires two detectives (played by Dustin Hoffman and Lily Tomlin) who keep a watchful eye over him at all times. At ALL times because, as Tomlin’s character says, “There’s nothing too small. If we might see you floss or masturbate that might be the key to your reality.”
It is most certainly not for everyone, and appeals largely to those with a “unique” sense of humor. But, if this does appeal to your sense of humor, you’ll be in for a treat.
In other entertainment news, there is a huge movie debut this weekend. “Bug,” starring Ashley Judd, looks as though it may be one of the better pure horror movies to be released in quite some time. No, the “Saw” films aren’t horror films in my book; they’re thrillers. And no, I don’t count those PG13 teeny-bopper flicks like “Boogeyman” and “The Ring” as horror. The trailer for “Bug” claims that it is “One of the most disturbing horror movies imaginable.” That’s enough for me, of course, because promotional previews are never misleading.
It has potential I suppose, and I am intrigued enough that I will most likely see it. As a big fan of the horror genre, I do find it a shame that the first true horror movie in sometime is being released on the 25th of May. You want to talk about a shoddy marketing plan? I can’t help but think you’re talking about the plan Lions Gate Films laid out for this movie.
The huge movie release I’m talking about, of course, is Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End. I’m just a writer; I don’t major in marketing, but when a blockbuster such as this comes along, would it not be sensible to try and release movies on a weekend where they won’t be absolutely swallowed up in the Disney Hype Machine?
Prediction: Pirates of The Caribbean will “shatter” box office records and no one will acknowledge the steady rise in ticket prices as an assisting factor.
MPL Radio once again makes its way into Around The Horn, yet on a much smaller scale this time around. The “Song Bet” I issued in last week’s column to V2 was denied, with the option for another bet left on the table. My creative ego took a hit upon admitting this, but I’ve got nothing. I do believe there is potential there to have some fun bets with the introduction of the radio format into MPL, but I’m struggling to think of something other than the song bet. If anyone reading has any ideas, I’m open to hear them.
Second, I love the commercials so far. I’m the kind of guy that will flip from station to station in between commercials for the very purpose of avoiding them entirely, but the ones used on the show this past week were well-known and entertaining. I think V2 and Blu are going to have to dig deep into the archives to keep pulling out treasures like that.
The only commercial that I can think of off the top of my head is a Christmas themed thirty second spot for Fruity Pebbles that aired when I was still a very young child. “Uh oh here comes you know who-o…yaba daba doo, delicious stew. Ho-ho-ho I’m hu-hu-hungry…”
Oh, wow…I’m definitely alone on that one.
In other MPL news, there was a great deal of conversation on the forums this week about the league’s potential switch-over from Playstation 2 to next generation, most likely Playstation 3. Ultimately, this has got to be the most important issue the MPL has had to face since its conception. One way or another, the league is going to lose a fair number of its members, some of whom have been a part of the MPL community for quite some time. What is the best path to take? When it comes down to it, only Paul can answer that. But, in the meantime, allow me to place some food for thought on the table.
The MPL should, for the first season of Madden 08 at least, stay with the Playstation 2 format. This is what makes sense to me after weighing the pros and cons of each side.
First, I own an Xbox360, so I am well aware of what Madden has to offer so far for this next generation of home consoles. Hint: It’s nothing good. It is no secret that many “next gen gamers” have stayed true to their Xbox and Playstation 2 versions of Madden. Sure, there are some who find the most high-tech offering to be far superior to its ancestors but, when it comes to quality assurance, isn’t it always the better bet to hang with the majority?
Next generation Madden, with all of its other problems aside, just doesn’t play well at this point. The in-game features are limited and the gameplay just isn’t crisp and fluid as it is for the current generation. There is no question that the game looks beautiful but, aesthetics aside, it is the gameplay that matters first and foremost. I’ve seen some people talk on the forums about how clunky they feel next-gen is and how they can’t get into it, only to turn right around and claim that they won’t be back for another season if the MPL doesn’t go next-gen. I’m not one to name names (Wade), but if the system’s clunky, it’s clunky. It needs a major overhaul to satisfy the masses and so far I’ve heard nothing on that front.
Playing next generation Madden is like taking home that crazy chick you meet at the bar. It’s all good until you sit back and realize that as sexy as they may be, with no substance you just feel somewhat dirty.
The second argument that leads me to believe MPL’s tenure with Madden 08 would be better served on the Playstation 2 is simple logistics. As far as products sold for the home console market are concerned during the month of April, the Nintendo Wii has a stranglehold on first place. In a distant second, there is the Playstation 2, then the Xbox360 and then, bringing up the rear, the Playstation 3 (as per IGN.com).
Based on this information, prepare yourselves, my readers, for a confusing yet logical series of hypotheses.
The Playstation 3 is a new system, having been released less than a year ago. Selling poorly as it has been, there are only a select number of individuals who actually own one. Of those select individuals, fewer have interest in Madden. Of those interested in Madden, fewer will purchase it for their Playstation 3 because of the documented issues. Of those who purchase it for their Playstation 3, fewer will play the game online. Of those who play the game online, fewer will participate in leagues. Of those who participate in leagues, fewer will come across the MPL. Of those who come across the MPL, fewer will meet the requirements to become a member. Of those who meet the requirements to become a member, fewer still will stick around…
As so many current members have who will be shown the door if the move is made. It’s a numbers game. Right now, the MPL is full of committed owners, most of whom will most likely be around for a while, with more waiting to move from the outside in. That will be lost if the move is made in August.
The biggest positive outcome I could foresee by switching over to next-generation would be, quite simply, innovation. The aforementioned numbers game makes sense, but it works both ways. On a grand scale, the number of people playing the next generation versions will almost certainly pale in comparison to those playing on the current generation and as such, most online leagues will stick with the current generation for the introduction of Madden 08. Obviously, that means that all of those who stick with next-generation Madden will have a far smaller selection of leagues to choose from and, if the MPL maintains everything that makes it so great, this league will be extremely appealing.
The question then remains: Does that positive outweigh all of the other negatives? In my opinion, it does not. The next question then becomes: How would staying on the Playstation 2 be detrimental?
The MPL would be losing some of its committed members? Although threats have been made, I don’t know how many of them I believe. I know that a fair share of those currently participating in the league of an Xbox360 or a Playstation 3, and I also know that, except for Hatchet and Pac, all others have shown a preference toward the current generation and again, the odds of that suddenly changing are slim.
Clearly, this is an issue which will ultimately be resolved closer to August but to me, the solution is much more clear than the back-and-forth discussions would indicate.
“One man bands” are only entertaining if the music that they produce is of a high quality. Think about it. I don’t know how many more “fantastic one man bands” I can suffer through in this lifetime.
This past week, a friend of mine said something that completely astonished me; “I hate urinals.”
Yes, this friend is very philosophical when drunk. I tried to explain to him their ease of use and accessibility, but he countered with “They splash!”
The conversation ended there because I myself have never experienced this “splashing” phenomenon. Perhaps I am doing something wrong?
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